Take five

Good ol' lastminute.com:

Did you know that taking at least 5 holidays a year is essential for a happy soul? Well, if your New Year's resolution is to have a happy, healthy 2007, lastminute.com is at hand to help. Check out some of our great deals, and remember, long weekends make for longer lives.

Well, that's 5 holidays less than I'm going to get - I wonder if I can sell my carbon budget yet?

Extra resolution

Sort my life out with Thinking Rock. It is very good and also free (which is just as well considering my trip to Borders today).

Full circle

The wheel has turned, and Celebrity Big Brother is here again!!

I'm not enticed by celebrity shows on the whole, and the bad publicity received by George Galloway last time out means that there are unlikely to be any famous politions this time round. Rumours abound that Robert Kilroy-Silk MEP will be taking part, but he lost his credentials long, long ago. He was elected to the European Parliament as a member of UKIP, vowing to wreck the place. Shortly afterwards he quit UKIP to form Veritas, his own party, but ended up walking out of this as well. I'm not sure he has much of a cause left to fight for, other than maybe to ressurect (sp?) his chat show.

Compared to last year I have a lot less time to spare so if I haven't heard of at least three of the contestants I don't think I shall bother watching.

We shall see...

Resolutions

1. Communicate more with my MP - instead of signing useless petitions and attending occasional protests I've decided to channel more of my many views and opinions through the official channels, if only to confirm my belief that this will prove just as ineffective. Regardless, my first letter to Nigel Griffiths about the Trident program is in the post, and he can expect one about data protection next week. And science funding the week after that. Maybe the local council would also like a letter about the cancelled Hogmaney (sp?) celebrations. It honestly wasn't that windy.
   
2. Go running at least three days out of seven
3. Quit taking the bus (always full of scottish schoolchildren) and start cycling instead
4. Write more blog posts (not many more), but write some of these posts on the subject of science, comeserate with my NERC responsibilites to 'promote science through non-tradiational public forums' (it says here)

Reflections

The new version of blogger.com, coupled with the New Year, causes me to evaluate my weblog (I hate the word blog) so far. A whole year, and about 20 posts to show for it. I really should be better at this.

It's not like I'm new to the net. I remember way back in the day, when Hotmail was an independent company, before Microsoft bought it. And before that, before Internet Explorer and Netscape Navigator, when there was nothing on the web but some pages about physics and some pictures of a dinosaur. And before the web, when the future was called Prestel, and it had a multi-user dungeon called SHADES, that was a bit like Second Life, but with text entry. With all my knowledge, I should be a multi-million earning web entrepreneur by now.

I suppose that, although I do get very excited about these developments, I've never really had the resources or the inclination to fully exploit them. I mean, I only acquired a broadband connection a month or two ago, and haven't used it so much. I enjoy reading weblogs, but am too busy/lazy to write in mine all that often. Plus I was influenced by books such as Silicon Snake Oil, by Clifford Stoll. I wonder if any of the civil servants about to spend so much tax payer's money on e-initiatives or the National Identity Register have read that. I suppose that I wouldn't like to invest too much of my free time in something that could still collapse in on itself.

Still, I still enjoying using my blog as a means to occasionally go off on a rant, and there's also the diary aspect that I enjoy. It should be helping my writing technique, even though I know it comes across as very pompous when I read it back. But that's just my style :-)

Weirdo things about Edbo

... I don't appreciate that there doesn't seem to be a slang name for Edinburgh (well, there's Edinbore but that's quite a disparaging term unsuitable for day-to-day use). My thoughts on people who write letters to the Metro I'll reserve for another day.

Every place deserves to have an alternate name that is easier to say and write - particularly for people like me who mangle all their words up when not concentrating. There's Bomo (Bournemouth), the Smoke (London), Lanks (Lancaster) and Dorch (Dorchester). So I will use the term Edbo, even though no-one else does.

So here are some of the unusual things I have discovered about Edbo:

1) No-one thanks the bus driver. You see, no matter how far you travel on the bus, the fare is always a pound. And the bus driver has no change. So you silently drop your cash in the slot (where it must be weighed electronically) or swipe your Ridacard. And then take your seat. Because of this there is no excuse to talk to the bus driver. And since you haven't spoken to him on the way in, for some reason it is more difficult to say something when departing the vehicle. So very few people do. At least that's what I've noticed.

2) You order some chips in a takeaway. The person behind the counter scoops some chips into a tray and asks if you would like salt and vinegar. You reply 'Yes, but not too much, please' bearing in mind what happened to poor Sid the Slug. Then, without asking for any further instruction, the person covers the chips in a very generous helping of brown sauce, completely spoiling them. The first time this happened I played back the scenario in my mind, and assumed that when I answered 'Yes, but not too much, please', she must have heard 'Yes, but could you also smother the chips in brown sauce, please'. Assuming it was my fault, I accepted the chips, but threw most of them away. The second time this happened, in the same shop, I assumed that the person serving the chips remembered me from before, clearly didn't like me and therefore wanted to spitefully ruin my food. Well, I was hurt, but I accepted the chips and decided never to go to that shop again. Well yesterday it happened in a different shop. Apparently it's a tradition.

3) The word 'outwith'. As in:

"I'm sorry your address is outwith the practice area for this surgery"
"What, you mean it's outside the practice area"
"I meant outwith"

I've noticed that in practically every written document produced at work and by civil institutions such as the local council or the university has a ban on the word 'outside'. I think it means the same 'outside', but it doesn't seem right. Probably designed as a way to confuse people. But why it is just this one word that is different?

4) I'm enjoying Newsnight, my second favourite show (after This Week). Suddenly, halfway through transmission (sometimes midway through an item or interview), the programming is inexpertly interrupted and the titles for something called Newsnight Scotland appear. There then follows 20 minutes of sheer tedium where they examine some burning issue of no significance, like the scottish economy has been predicted to grow by 0.2% next year, or whatever. All very interesting, but if I wanted to learn more about local issues I'd read the local newspaper, or watch the local news. In the meantime I'm missing all the exciting Newsnight reports promised in my Newsnight e-mail, sent to me earlier in the day by Jeremy Paxman. The only option is to watch Newsnight on-line, but the live feed is so blocky and stuttery I can conclude that almost everyone else in Scotland has chosen to do the same. I feel a petition to the Scottish Parliament coming on...

Credit cards

I will commence whinging about credit cards... now.

Why oh why am I ineligable for credit?? When you can hardly open a newspaper without reading about some irresponsible bon viveur who is £80,000 in debt it makes no sense that I should be denied a simple card with a modest credit limit of, say £400. Worst of all, the syncophantic rejection letters from the credit card companies read worse than job rejection letters, in that none give ANY SUBSTANTIAL REASON for my lack of creditworthiness.

To quote: 'with each application we consider a number of factors including information from credit reference agencies and the information you provided on your application form. This information is combined to produce a score. Unfortunately, your score did not meet the score required in this instance.'

Translation: 'We punched your info into a computer and computer says no'

But the issue I have is that the form was so short that they could not gather any useful info on me. They wanted to know my income, which was greater than the minimum stated necessary to qualify for the card. They wanted to know my address, which is a very respectable address (rented admittedly) in the capital city of Scotland - a nation of spendthrifts. So the information I provided on the form must have checked out fine. It's down to the credit reference agency then. But I can only think of two things that they have on me:

1. I never pay my bills before the final demand arrives - well really, it would be foolish of me to pay bills before the final demand. Why would anyone who values their money hand it over to a greedy utilites company any earlier than necessary, when it could be earning interest?? Large successful companies such as Sainsbury's defer payment to suppliers as long as is legally possible for just this reason. This should demonstrate I am shrewd with my finances and so more deserving of credit.

2. My bank account is always maxed out on overdraft. Yes, well I know this sounds dodgy, but it is an interest free overdraft for goodness sake. Once again, why should I allocate spare cash to keep my account in the red when it could be making itself useful earning interest in a savings account elsewhere??

So I'm being financially smart but it looks bad to a computer database. And people ask me why I worry that soon a big computer database will be making many more critical decisions about my life once the national identity register is up and running. Unless they let me program the computer of course.

5 things...

Up till 2 or 3 years ago, I only had to check that I had my keys and wallet before leaving the house. That way I would not only be able to buy stuff (if necessary) whilst I was out but I could also easily gain access to my residence on my return.

Then I upgraded by mobile phone from a big 10lb brick model with a painful aerial poking out of it to a cheap, nasty but smaller model. So I started doing the 'keys, wallet, phone' check through my pockets before stepping over the threshold.

Just recently it seems everywhere I go involves a long walk or a tedious journey on public transport. So I take my iPod in my coat pocket to make best use of the time. Since its battery life is pitiful (and Apple charge about £40 to fit a new battery), I also take the charger lead. This means I can also use it as a handy 4Gb hard drive, should the need arise.

So keys, wallet, phone, iPod, charger lead. Five things is much more effort to remember than two, and I'm always forgetting one of those items.

And, like today, it's usually the freakin' keys.

Great cultural minds...

Well I noticed that some famous faces agree with me about the misappropriation of Johny Cash! (ref. my last whinge but 3, made a lifetime ago)

Today I hate...

... searching for a flatshare in Edinbore... sheesh who are these people?? Why do they all want to live here, and why are they either English and called Tarquin or raving Scottish nationists with Saltires bedecked over every item of furniture?? How come I am always asked which country I come from, isn't it obvious or should I too engage in displays of fervent nationalism (dressing as a Beefeater, Morris Dancer or one of the baddies from Braveheart, maybe), to allay any doubt??

Man, they show you to the broom cupboard, explain that this is the room on offer, just as advertised. Just as you are trying to calculate whether there is physically space for all of your belongings when another potential suitor arrives. On the way out you add your name and phone number to the list (already 15 strong) with the promise that they'll make their decision in a day or two, once the interview panel has convened. Well if they offered me the flat I'd turn them down, just to find out and surprised and taken aback they are that maybe their poxy broom cupboard isn't so desirable after all. I'd have to make sure the 15 other people did the same, though, for full effect.