Credit cards

I will commence whinging about credit cards... now.

Why oh why am I ineligable for credit?? When you can hardly open a newspaper without reading about some irresponsible bon viveur who is £80,000 in debt it makes no sense that I should be denied a simple card with a modest credit limit of, say £400. Worst of all, the syncophantic rejection letters from the credit card companies read worse than job rejection letters, in that none give ANY SUBSTANTIAL REASON for my lack of creditworthiness.

To quote: 'with each application we consider a number of factors including information from credit reference agencies and the information you provided on your application form. This information is combined to produce a score. Unfortunately, your score did not meet the score required in this instance.'

Translation: 'We punched your info into a computer and computer says no'

But the issue I have is that the form was so short that they could not gather any useful info on me. They wanted to know my income, which was greater than the minimum stated necessary to qualify for the card. They wanted to know my address, which is a very respectable address (rented admittedly) in the capital city of Scotland - a nation of spendthrifts. So the information I provided on the form must have checked out fine. It's down to the credit reference agency then. But I can only think of two things that they have on me:

1. I never pay my bills before the final demand arrives - well really, it would be foolish of me to pay bills before the final demand. Why would anyone who values their money hand it over to a greedy utilites company any earlier than necessary, when it could be earning interest?? Large successful companies such as Sainsbury's defer payment to suppliers as long as is legally possible for just this reason. This should demonstrate I am shrewd with my finances and so more deserving of credit.

2. My bank account is always maxed out on overdraft. Yes, well I know this sounds dodgy, but it is an interest free overdraft for goodness sake. Once again, why should I allocate spare cash to keep my account in the red when it could be making itself useful earning interest in a savings account elsewhere??

So I'm being financially smart but it looks bad to a computer database. And people ask me why I worry that soon a big computer database will be making many more critical decisions about my life once the national identity register is up and running. Unless they let me program the computer of course.

5 things...

Up till 2 or 3 years ago, I only had to check that I had my keys and wallet before leaving the house. That way I would not only be able to buy stuff (if necessary) whilst I was out but I could also easily gain access to my residence on my return.

Then I upgraded by mobile phone from a big 10lb brick model with a painful aerial poking out of it to a cheap, nasty but smaller model. So I started doing the 'keys, wallet, phone' check through my pockets before stepping over the threshold.

Just recently it seems everywhere I go involves a long walk or a tedious journey on public transport. So I take my iPod in my coat pocket to make best use of the time. Since its battery life is pitiful (and Apple charge about £40 to fit a new battery), I also take the charger lead. This means I can also use it as a handy 4Gb hard drive, should the need arise.

So keys, wallet, phone, iPod, charger lead. Five things is much more effort to remember than two, and I'm always forgetting one of those items.

And, like today, it's usually the freakin' keys.